Friday

Post Pardum Bleck

So, we are three weeks out from birth, and last night it hit me.

I am depressed.

My husband went back to work. I feel abandoned. I feel overwhelmed. I feel like I cannot possibly handle five children.

I feel like I will never lose this weight, or the feeling that I'll be fat forever. I just want to hide in a corner somewhere and escape life. I don't want to be here!

The joyful laughter of my children is obnoxious to me. Their playfulness is exhausting to me. I just want to lay down and cry. I want to run away.

So, whether these are just the blues, or true post pardum depression, I don't know. I do know it will not conquer me. I will overcome.

Help me, Jesus!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey girl
I'm so sorry to hear you are having a rough time of it. I know both times Lance went back to work right after we had babies were rough times for me as well..and I didn't have 4 other children. Hang in there hon and remember this is just a short season in your life..you WILL lose that weight and you WILL learn to enjoy your children again. God knows you're hurting and He is always by your side to comfort you.
Love you

Steph said...

in time this too shall pass...will be praying for you, ronnie, and the kids. as you yourself said...you WILL overcome this, the Lord will see you through to the end.

:)

i've only had two and didn't have the blues w/ Ryder but i did w/ mattie - she was my first - my doctor said if it lasted longer than two weeks to come and see him. give it two weeks then get some help.